


Kiss A Guy? Sure, Why Not? (Also Thinks Girls Are Hot)

by ssssssssssssssssssspiderboi



Series: Irondad & Spiderson Dabbles [5]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bider man, Bisexual Peter Parker, Gen, Human Disaster Peter Parker, M/M, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Precious Peter Parker, Protective Tony Stark, Short & Sweet, Sweet, Teen Peter Parker, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Has A Heart, also thinks, does whatever a bider can, girls are hot, kiss a guy, sure why not
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-30
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2019-09-02 13:33:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16787935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ssssssssssssssssssspiderboi/pseuds/ssssssssssssssssssspiderboi
Summary: Bider-Man, Bider-Man. Does whatever a bider can. Kiss a guy? Sure, why not? Also thinks girls are hot.______________________________“Fine,” He sighed. “Explain, you’ve got one minute on the clock, starting now. Go.” The engineer didn’t know what to expect from Peter, but he certainly wasn’t expecting the kid to start speaking a mile a minute that he only caught half of.“So there’s this guy who goes to my school and is a grade above me who’s really nice and sweet and smart and funny,” Peter began quickly, grammar going out the window in order to save time. “A-a-and sometimes he sits with Ned and me at lunch even though he could literally have a seat at any table he wants. A-Anyways, he mentioned that he goes to Oscorp after school sometimes to help his dad and I told him that I was applying for an internship there and he smiled at me and then I signed up. I-I didn’t know what I was doing, I-I’m sorry. I wasn’t th-thinking, I w-was just trying to get him to like me and I’m sorry tha-”“Okay,” Tony interrupted, holding a hand out. “Alright. So, what you're telling me is that this was all for a boy?"Peter nodded shamefully. "'M sorry...""Pete, you're ridiculous,"





	1. Chapter 1

“Peter Benjamin Parker, why the hell am I getting an email from Norman Osborne about how I’m losing my best intern to him?”

Maybe it was the tone of his voice, or maybe it was the fact that it was accompanied by loud footsteps coming down the hall, but it sent a wave of panic coursing through Peter. The teen jumped a bit, dropping his phone, and looked behind him to see Tony making his way to where he sat on the couch with a look of anger. Needless to say, it scared the hell out of Peter. His voice was caught in his throat as he opened it to try and explain, but nothing came out. 

“Oh, so you _do_ know exactly what I’m walking about,” Tony stood in front of his kid, looking down at him with his hands on his hips. “Well go on, explain yourself. What did Oscorp offer you? Was it something that I did? I thought you wanted to work here, so what did I do to change that and make you go behind my back to work for my biggest rival?” Thousands of thoughts began racing through Peter’s mind, most prominent ones being _No no no no no_ and _What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?_ , and before he was able to say anything, Tony held up a hand to cut him off. “You know what? No, I don’t want to hear it. I’ll be in my lab, don’t come down unless you’re in imminent danger. Happy will drive you home in the morning.”

Of course, it was as Tony walked away when Peter found his voice again, “Mr Stark, w-wait-!” He got up from where he’d been sitting and hurried to catch up with his pseudo-father. “I-I can explain!”

“I told you, I don’t want to hear it. What part of that did you not understand, Parker?” Tony spat. Sure, he put on a tough exterior, but he really just felt betrayed by the kid. May had once told him that it was Peter’s dream, _his dream_ , to work at Stark Industries one day, and now he was going behind his back to intern at Oscorp? It hurt.

Peter knew he shouldn’t have been upset, but he couldn’t help but feel a pang in his heart with how Tony looked at him with such disappointment and disgust. It was rightfully earned, though. Peter knew that. “I-I-I’m sorry, sir, but please. J-Just hear me out.” 

Tony stared at the teen pleading in front of him for a moment before giving in. “Fine,” He sighed. “Explain, you’ve got one minute on the clock, starting now. Go.” The engineer didn’t know what to expect from Peter, but he certainly wasn’t expecting the kid to start speaking a mile a minute that he only caught half of.

“So there’s this guy who goes to my school and is a grade above me who’s really nice and sweet and smart and funny,” Peter began quickly, grammar going out the window in order to save time. “A-a-and sometimes he sits with Ned and me at lunch even though he could literally have a seat at any table he wants. A-Anyways, he mentioned that he goes to Oscorp after school sometimes to help his dad and I told him that I was applying for an internship there and he smiled at me and then I signed up. I-I didn’t know what I was doing, I-I’m sorry. I wasn’t th-thinking, I w-was just trying to get him to like me and I’m sorry tha-”

“Okay,” Tony interrupted, holding a hand out. “Alright. So, what you're telling me is that this was all for a boy?"

Peter nodded shamefully. "'M sorry..."

"Pete, you're ridiculous," Tony told him, hands over his face but unable to prevent the smallest of grins. Peter hadn't suddenly gotten manipulative or purposely betrayed him or anything, he just didn't know how to handle a crush. He went to _Oscorp_ for a _crush_ \- that was more in his character. He was still a bit peeved out how this all happened, but that's all now. "Alright, who's his father?"

"I'm sorry?" Peter asked, looking up again with confusion. He was being so much more formal now, as if that'd help him win favor with Tony again. 

"The one you said works at Oscorp?" Tony sighed. "What's his name? Depending on his work ethic, I might bring him over here so that way you have no reason to go over there anymore."

Peter's face fell a little and he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Um, well, the thing is.. I'm not sure if that can happen." Tony's face went stern and confused, but let the teen continue. "N-now don't get mad, please, because I-I didn't know this when we first met, but.... His dad _is_ Mr Osborn." Of course, Parker luck just had to make the cute junior in his chemistry and gym class Harry Osborn. Of all people it could've been, him! It wasn't like Peter wanted to like him, he tried to dislike him for Mr Stark, but it became impossible. 

It was oddly Romeo and Juliet-esc, but hopefully no one will be dying. This is real life, after all, and stuff like that doesn't happen. Then again, getting bitten by a radioactive spider and gaining powers from it doesn't seem like something that would happen in real life either. 

"Do you have to make things more complicated for yourself, kid?" Tony asked, stifling a laugh. This was so absurd, so _Peter_ that it was hilarious. "It just had to be Harry, didn't it?"

"I'm sorry, I tried to not-"

"He's a good kid, Pete," He put a hand on the teen's shoulder before moving it up to ruffle the messy mop of curls. "His father might be an absolute dick, but the few times I've met him, he's been nothing but polite. I didn't know he went to your school though, thought Norman shipped him off to some boarding school."

"Yeah, it was kinda a surprise to me too," Peter replied, feeling more at ease now. Tony wasn't, or at least didn't appear to be, mad anymore. Thank god. 

"I just want to make sure that he doesn't have any bad intentions with my kid," Tony returned to somewhat serious dad mode again. 

"Mr Stark, I don't think-"

"Hey, it's my turn to talk right now. Alright?" Peter went quiet and Tony continued. "Now like I said- he's not a dick from what I know, but his dad is. Before you get too attached , or more than you already are, I want to make sure that Norman isn't trying to manipulate Harry in order to get Stark secrets from you. I wouldn't put it below him. How about you tell me about how you too got to talking?"

Peter would be lying if he said that that hadn't crossed his mind once or twice. After all, something randomly blossoming between the son of Norman Osborn and what was basically the son of Tony Stark seemed very unlikely and kind of suspicious. Ned expressed his worries about that, but tried to stay positive and hope for his friend. Plus, they'd recently found out that Harry liked guys as well as girls, and they thought that was a reason to celebrate and be hopeful. "Yeah, good idea," Peter nodded. "It started when he stood up to Flash for me one day, the day I came in with a black eye. Well, after Flash backed off, he helped me get my stuff off the floor and we started walking to fifth period, chemistry, that we apparently shared. 

We talked a little in class and again during lunch. He sat by Ned and I, which was so cool since y’know, he could sit at any table he wants. I’ve kinda been labeled as the Stark Internship kid, so we talked about that a bit and he talked about some of the work he does at Oscorp. I swear I didn’t know until then, and I was kinda in too deep at that point. It was mostly horrible science puns and finger guns on my end for two weeks until I pulled a stupid move and said that I was looking into Oscorp after Harry said that he would want to hang out after school some time when he was free.. Don’t worry, Ned gave me a painful kick to the shin after that.”

Tony stayed quiet for a moment, thinking, before responding, “It sounds like that he’s either into you as well or desperate to bring you over to the dark side. Nowhere in between.”

“You think so?” Peter asked, clearly hopeful for the former.

“What sane person would listen to you make awkward puns on a daily basis if not for either of those reasons?” The man teased, ruffling his kid’s hair. “You know, you can always invite him over here one day, if you wanted and if his father would let him in a ten mile radius of this place. Obviously, no going into any of the special projects lab until we know for certain, but this’ll definitely be better than you going to Oscorp.” May was going to get a kick out of this, Tony thought. Damn, he needed to get some childhood photos of Pete to embarrass him if Harry ever came over- that’s what good mentor-dad-thing’s do, right? She and Pepper could probably help make sure he did the right thing.

“Are you serious? That’s… awesome!” Peter beamed. “Thank you so much, a-and I really am sorry about this whole mess.”

“You’re a teenager, you’re going to do stupid things,” Tony shrugged, unable to help a grin himself. “Plus, there is that Gala this weekend that I was planning on ditching. I could bring you, if your aunt would let you go. Harry’s probably the only kid there, so it’d give you two time to hang out.”

This left Peter’s jaw hanging open a little. Did he really just get invited to _The Gala_ just to hang out with his crush? This was crazy! “Holy crap…! I need to find a new suit-” He needed to do a lot more than just that- find out under which set of lockers was his suit from homecoming, learn how to talk to Harry, figure out if he should act like he didn’t know that he’d be there or not or play it off casually, find some non-pun related conversation topics, etc. 

“I can get that for you, kid,” Tony replied, amused at Peter’s expression. “You are not walking out of this house Saturday night wearing an untailored suit like you did for your homecoming. While baggy clothes can be adorable, if that’s what you’re going for because you’ve got it, a baggy suit makes you look like a slum. You’re going to be a proper little Stark that night, okay?”

“You don’t have to do that, Mr Stark,” Peter insisted, slightly flustered at being called “adorable” by his pseudo-dad. He wasn’t eight, he wasn’t adorable. 

“I _want_ to, that’s the thing. It’s not like it’d put a dent in my wallet anyways.”

“Right, okay. Thanks,” Peter smiled, before pausing for a moment. “You think he’ll find me adorable?”

Tony couldn’t help but chuckle at that. “Pete, you’ve got a baby face, it’s a part of your charm. Flaunt those cursed puppy dog eyes you’ve got and if he wasn’t interested before, he will be. Trust me, I wouldn’t steer you wrong here.”

Before the older man knew it, the spiderling had wrapped his arms around him in a tight hug, a soft smile upon his lips. “Thanks for helping me, and I’m sorry for going behind your back before.” Tony smiled in return, running a hand through the boy’s curls. 

“It’s fine, kiddo, don’t worry. I am going to embarrass you at one point as payback, May should have some good ammo.”

The change of expression from fondness to absolute terror on Peter’s face was priceless.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The elevator doors opened up to reveal a beautiful room with high ceilings along with party-goers that looked equally grand and expensive. The room was dim with indigo lighting coming down along with natural moonlight shining on the stage and tables. On each table, a glowing candle sat in the middle of the silky table cloth and laced plate settings. Everyone attending was either in a sharp suit- typically navy blue or black, but with a few white ones- or ball gowns coming in an array of colors. Peter’s jaw was dropped as he took the room in- it was insane! “Alright, c’mon, Pete,” Tony put an arm around the amazed kids shoulders and led him out of the elevator. 
> 
> “ _Holy crap_ ,” Peter gasped. His headed pivoted all about as Tony led him to their table. “Ned was right, I think the floors are made of money…!” 
> 
> “Take it in, but you’ve got to close your mouth,” He used his pointer finger to push Peter’s chin back up. “You’ll draw unwanted attention to yourself and probably catch a fly or two.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for being inactive! Life’s a bitch and all. Anyways, I know it’s not much, but please enjoy:)

**Friday, 4:38 PM**

**P. Parker:** NED NED NED GET ON RIGHT NOW  
CODE RED. I REPEAT, CODE RED!

**N. Leeds:** What happened??? Is everything okay???  
Are you in trouble or something? I thought you were at the compound this weekend.

**P. Parker:** IT'S HARRY, MR STARK FOUND OUT ABOUT THE WHOLE THING

**N. Leeds:** HE DID?!  
How the hell are you still alive to text me about this?!  
..are you even the real Peter? 

**P. Parker:** Okay okay, so apparently Mr Osborn emailed him about my internship application, right? And obviously he was pretty pissed off, I mean it's Oscorp! 

**N. Leeds:** Yeah, bad taste on your part. 

**P. Parker:** I told you that I tried not to.  
Anyways,, I explained everything and he was like “I'll bring the dad over to SI so you don't go over there” and then I had to explain that it was Harry. He actuall took that pretty well!

**P. Parker:** *actually

**N. Leeds:** I'm still worried that he's tricking you.  
It seems like there's more to this story btw. I mean, no offense, but this wasn't really code red worthy.

**P. Parker:** He said the same thing, since even though Harry’s really nice, his dad can be an ass.  
Mr Stark wants to make sure that Mr Osborn is setting Harry up or anything, so he's taking me to The Gala™ tomorrow. THE GALA!!

**N. Leeds:** SHUT UP  
ARE YOU SERIOUS?!

**P. Parker:** YEAH  
He also said he's going to try and give me some tips on how to not embarrass myself or anything in front of him there and turn me into, and I quote, “a proper little Stark” and how not to totally embarrass myself in front of him.

**N. Leeds:** Dude, he’s such a dad.

**P. Parker:** Shut up

**N. Leeds:** You’re never going to live it down, Peter.  
You better send me pictures of tomorrow night, the floors are probably made of money. 

**P. Parker:** I wouldn’t be surprised tbh  
Gtg, Mr Stark’s calling me. I’ll keep you updated!

**N. Leeds:** You better! 

———————————————

“C’mon, kid,” Peter heard Tony call from the hall. “We got to get the measuring done if we want a suit for you by tomorrow night.” He got up from where he was sitting at the kitchen island, stuffing his phone into his pocket and going to follow Tony down the hall towards the elevator.

“Coming!” Peter had replied as he caught up. “You don’t have to get me a new suit, y’know.”

“What if I want to?” Tony asked, brows raised. “I like spending money on you, Pete. It’s not a problem, or hassle, or whatever it is you’re worried about.”

“Right, my bad,” 

“You don’t have to apologize,”

The suit fitting hadn’t taken too long, save for Tony attempting to give Peter a mini crash course on the different cuts and all to help him make a decision. It was the kid’s first real nice suit— it had to be special. Of course, there was a plentiful of pictures take during the fitting and testing on of suits later that day, and all were sent to May. It was a little unspoken agreement the two had— at whatever chance they could, they’d send pictures of the spiderling being the adorable kid he was in exchange for either baby pictures (Tony’s request) or ridiculous footage from the Baby Monitor Protocol (May’s request). Everyone wins, except Peter, who is utterly humiliated each time.

Over the course of the day and up until they arrived at the Gala, Peter had gone to Tony for little tips and Tony offered advice as well. He could see how embarrassed the teen got sometimes when asking questions, so he thought that this might be helpful as well. Nerves about the Gala were also apparent, but Tony had assumed that the kid would overthink it a little and was actually somewhat prepared. They’d also picked Peter out a rather sharp suit and got the teen looking all dressed up. Peter, amazingly enough, still managed to maintain a baby face with gel in his hair.

——————

Peter nervously fidget with his sleeve cuffs as they rode the elevator up to the penthouse, doing his best to make sure nothing was wrinkled in the process. “Relax there, kiddo,” Tony said, putting a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “It’ll be fine, you look like a million bucks, thanks to your’s truly,”

“I’m afraid that you might’ve _actually_ spent a million bucks,” Peter mumbled.

“Don’t worry kid, the suit isn’t that expensive,” Tony smiled. “With how clumsy you are, I’m not giving you anything that expensive just to have a tear in the seems or a spill stain. You’ll have to work up to that.” 

“I don’t think I’d be able to handle a million dollars on my shoulders, so no thanks.”

“But you can handle taking care of a city?”

“More than a suit worth more than me? Without a doubt.”

“First of all, you’re definitely worth more than a suit. No questions asked there,” Tony sofly squeezed his shoulder. “And second of all, you’re going to be fine. Trust me, m’kay?”

“But… but what if he doesn’t really like me?” The teen kept his head down, embarrassed. “W-what if he really is just using me to get your secrets? What if--”

“Alright, alright. Enough ‘what-if’s, understand? It’ll just drive you crazy,” He explained. "Just remember what I told you, okay kiddo? Just be your nerdy little self, don't hold back on the puppy eyes, and don't give away any Stark secrets until we know for sure if he can be trusted or not. If not, then we can sell fake ones for a good price to bleed Norman dry and lead him in the wrong direction. "

“Why am I getting the feeling that you secretly want Harry to be a spy just so you can mess with his dad?” Peter asked.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Tony shrugged lightly ruffling the kid’s hair.

“Hey hey hey!” Peter attempted to duck away from the hand, bending back rather oddly. “It took a while to get it looking good, and you’ll mess it up!”

“Mess it up? How dare you?” He faked being offended. “And you don’t think I know that? I’m helping you kid, trust me. You had it slicked down too much, it needed some fluffiness on the top. Now stand back up, kid. You look like you’re doing some horrifying limbo move.” 

Did the kid have bones? Someone should not be able to bend that far back— it was actually kind of terrifying. Spiders didn’t exactly have bones, so perhaps that screwed with his DNA too? Oh god, did he have to find out if the kid had an exoskeleton? Exactly how much spider was in his DNA?

“Alright,” Peter replied hesitantly as he stood back up properly. “I’ll trust you.”

“I’d hoped you would,” And with that, the elevator doors opened up to reveal a beautiful room with high ceilings along with party-goers that looked equally grand and expensive. The room was dim with indigo lighting coming down along with natural moonlight shining on the stage and tables. On each table, a glowing candle sat in the middle of the silky table cloth and laced plate settings. Everyone attending was either in a sharp suit- typically navy blue or black, but with a few white ones- or ball gowns coming in an array of colors. Peter’s jaw was dropped as he took the room in- it was insane! “Alright, c’mon, Pete,” Tony put an arm around the amazed kids shoulders and led him out of the elevator. 

“ _Holy crap_ ,” Peter gasped. His headed pivoted all about as Tony led him to their table. “Ned was right, I think the floors are made of money…!” 

“Take it in, but you’ve got to close your mouth,” He used his pointer finger to push Peter’s chin back up. “You’ll draw unwanted attention to yourself and probably catch a fly or two.”

“R-right,” Peter nodded. “Right. So, the plan. Do we have a plan? Do we need one? I can’t remember.”

“That sentence alone should tell you that you need a plan,” Tony teased. “Let’s see… Do you two follow each other on any social media?”

“Uh, yeah,” Peter nodded, skepticism painting his expression. “On Instagram. Why?”

“Because,” he put his hand on Peter’s phone, waiting for permission before taking it and opening up the camera. “You can take a picture and post it, and chances are he'll see it before the night ends and comment on it. Especially…” He tapped the screen a little bit. “If he has post notifications on for you like you do for him.” Peter's face flushed red with embarrassment at this, quickly reaching out to grab the device, but it was held out of his reach. “Ah ah ah, not yet. You still need a picture, don’t you? And by the way, I’m offended that you never had me follow you, but I can rectify that for you.”

“I never thought to mention it,” Peter tried to defend himself. “Sorry.”

“Mhm, yeah. Sure,” Tony rolled his eyes. “We’ll go with that.” Definitely that, and not to avoid what May deemed ‘embarrassing dad moments’. At first, Tony tried to claim that he didn’t know what she was talking about, but now, he more or less accepted it and had a little fin with it. He and Peter had never yet really discussed that whole thing, but they both have had their slips here and there, so it at least seemed that they were on the same page. “Alright, now… smile for the camera,”

Tony held the phone out and wrapped an arm around the teen;s shoulders. It was obvious that Peter was a little embarrassed by the flush in his cheeks, a ‘mission accomplished’ for the engineer, but he gave a nice smile anyways. With this, he gave Peter back his phone and asked the teen to send the picture to him as well. Not only did he think that May may like to see it, but he wanted to keep it for himself, too.

“Alright, so I just post it and hope that he sees it at some point tonight?” Peter asked after sending the photo to Tony. “What if he doesn’t, or scrolls past it or something?” As much as just being here at the event was amazing, they did have a bit of a goal— see what’s going on in this whole kerfuffle. Plus, Peter was looking forward to hanging out with Harry outside of a thirty minute lunch or a little bit in class. 

“A lot of it is waiting, especially with making moves like this,” Tony explained. Damn, he felt so much like a, well, like a dad right now. A good, helpful father though, and not dismissive like how Howard was. He was enjoying helping Peter out with his little crush, and the kid clearly needed it too. Really, the kid was almost hopeless— almost, but not quite. “It’s… sort of stemming from playing hard to get, but obviously different. You’re going to seem nonchalant, about seeing him here, which most likely will happen by the way, which more likely than not will get him to be more interested in you. Right?”

“Right, right,” Peter nodded. How well would he be able to keep up the ‘hard to get’ act? Well, they’d see have to wait and see. “You’re the expert, after all.”

“Indeed I am,” The engineer confirmed. The two proceeded to go back and forth between making fun of some of the other party-goers and advice asking/receiving for a while. Once he’d had the picture posted, Peter proceeded to check his notifications about every five minutes. After the first few times, Tony turned it into a little game for himself by having a drink of his virgin peach Bellini each time Peter either checked phone or looked around the room for his crush. It wouldn’t get him drunk, obviously, but it was entertaining nonetheless.

“Stark!” A voice called from behind them, interrupting their conversation on whether the woman at table five was secretly Cruella De Vil or not. “Glad you could make it. I see you brought that intern along with you, hm?”

“Back off of the kid, Norman,” Tony rolled his eyes, muttering an annoyed _‘here we go again’_ under his breath.

“Well, he did—“

“The application was a dumb teenager mistake. Speaking of, where’s your’s?”

Peter had craned his neck to try and spot Harry. He was here, wasn’t he?

“Uh, sorry. Got caught behind a few couples and lost you for a second, dad,” Harry explained after appearing from within the crowd. The teen saw the other sitting besides Tony and smiled brightly, “Oh, hey, Peter. “

“Harry, h-hi!” A wonderful start already— well down playing ‘hard to get’, Parker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings, lads and lassies (and all y'all pals in between)!  
> Hope you all enjoyed this! I’m probably gonna make two more chapters of this, but let me know if you want more or whatnot. There’ll be at least one more to go through the rest of the Gala, but who knows.  
> \- <3 Sam  
> (Tumblr: ssssssssssssssssssspiderboi )


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It sounded silly, but Peter’s biggest worry was that. He just… he really liked this guy. Harry. All his life, he dealt with people faking being his friend for answers in school or just trying to use him for something, and he didn’t want it to be that way with Harry. This wasn’t some douchey classmate he was talking to because he was lonely in that class and it turned out it was only so he could get homework answers. Like previously stated, Peter really did like Harry. It always felt awful to be used, but Peter almost felt like he had a chance now, that Harry could possibly like him back, and that would make it hurt so much worse. If it even turned out that way. 
> 
> Was he overthinking?
> 
> He might be overthinking.
> 
> He was probably overthinking.
> 
> “Hey Peter, how’s the ransom going?”
> 
> Oh shit, he was screwed now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
> I'm sorry I took so long, I had not meant for this hiatus. Hope you enjoy anyways!

“You two know each other?” Norman nearly interrogated. Tony shot the man a dirty look, going to shoot back before Peter gave him a look. He almost ignored it in order to defend his kid before the other teen spoke,

“Yeah, I, um, told you about him. Remember?” Harry asked. “The guy from my chemistry class that helped me study for that test?”

“You never mentioned a name.”

“I’m pretty sure I did.”

“Excuse me, are you--”

“Alright,” Tony interjected. “We all know Peter. That’s established now, right?”

No one argued, though it did kind of seem like Norman snarled, causing Tony to raise a brow.

“Alright, good.” He turned to Norman now. “Now, I’m assuming there’s a few things you wanted to discuss.”

“The great Tony Stark is right, again.”

“I usually am. Get use to it.”

The two old men continued to snark, some comments more professional trash while others being flat out insults, as Harry moved his seat to be next to Peter instead of his father. Norman didn’t seem to notice, but Tony did glance over, if for just a moment. His gaze seemed to soften briefly in that moment, before contorting back to annoyance and frustration when Norman had his attention again. “So, are they, um, always like this?” Peter asked in a hush tone, already kicking himself for stuttering.

“Oh, this?” Harry smiled a little. “It’s just the start. Things can get really ugly, especially if one of them isn’t sober.”

“Well, Mister Stark doesn’t really drink anymore.”

“Yeah, I know. I meant my dad. I swear, he’d bet the whole company on a coin flip if Stark said he was too chicken to.”

They both laughed a quietly at that, hunched over and whispering like school children to each other. Admittedly, Peter had felt his face get a little warm with their close proximity, but it was just so they could hear each other, right? Right. _Right_.

“You didn’t tell me you were going to be here,” Harry commented. “I saw the picture of you and him on Instagram, and somehow convinced my father to come over here.”

“In my defense, I, uh, didn’t really know I was coming until yesterday.”

“Yesterday?” Harry cocked an eyebrow. “That’s kinda short notice, especially for a boss to give an employee. And no offense, but how come he brought you? Again, really not trying to sound like an ass, but most people here don’t bring anyone besides their spouse, or kid in my case.”

Right. That would seem weird, wouldn't it? Most interns also didn’t spend the weekend over at their boss’s or have them listed as an emergency contact, did they? Well, this is why he and Tony had a little lie prepared for situations like this. “Well, I’m Mister Stark’s personal intern,” Please let this be convincing. “So, I’m usually around for a lot of stuff involving the company.”

Harry seemed to buy it, because there wasn’t any confusion in his expression. “Alright, that makes sense. I’m guessing you never really planned to intern at Oscorp though, right? I mean, you have a pretty good deal already, and I don’t think I’d give it up.”

“Yeah,” Peter confirmed, rubbing the back of his neck a little. “I, uh, was kind of dumb when I said that..”

“No worries,” He smiled, nuding Peter’s shoulder a bit. “Oh, off topic, but don’t we have that chem project coming up? I forget if it was that class or not.”

“Oh right, we do. I think she said she was going to talk more about in on Monday. Didn’t she say we could have partners?”

“Mhm, pretty sure she did. Want to work together?”

“Sure,” Peter answered, a little too eager. “I-I mean, yeah. Sure. Mhm. Awesome.” _Stop talking, Parker._ “Totally.” _Shut up!_ He shut up after that, glancing over to Tony as if he could pause his conversation with Harry to get advice on what to say as if this were some weird video game. Tony, however, was still exchanging insults with Norman. He, admittedly, felt pretty stressed right now. No, that was an understatement. Peter actually felt a bit panicky-- he didn’t want to screw up his chances right now, and it still ate away at him that he might be getting used right now. 

He did his best to not act so awkward, to just socialize like a functional human being, despite growing a little more anxious with each stumble of his words or stutter. It took Peter a lot of effort to refrain from slapping himself a few times.Tony seemed to notice his worry and rubbed the kid’s arm a little.

The first coarse, salad and bread, came and went soon enough. The respective billionaires asked the other’s kid questions on and off as they ate, though quite a few times, the other adult would respond in their stead. Harry and Peter played a little game of taking a sip of their water each time the adult they came with interrupted. Peter went through a lot of water very fast when they started that.

“Um, I-I’ll be right back,” Peter said, standing up from his chair.

“You okay?” Harry asked, brows furrowed with concern.

“Yeah, yeah,” He nodded. “Just, uh, gotta run to the restroom. If I’m not back in five minutes, I’m being held for ransom. Leave me, I don’t wanna take the SATs next year.”

The other teen laughed, “Tell them to come get me too then. I take them next month on the fourth, and I am _not_ ready.”

“Mood, but you’ll do fine, man.”

“Hope so.”

Just as Peter was about to walk off, Tony took his arm and gently pulled him over. “You’re doing fine, just so you know,” He whispered. “You need anything? You okay?”

“No, ‘m fine. Thanks.”

“Alright, just let me know.”

“I will.”

It took Peter a few seconds to figure out exactly which direction the facilities were, but he found it after a few three-sixty turns. He had to squeeze between a bunch of other party goers, almost tripping over a nice woman’s long dress on the way over. The teen let out a sigh of relief once in the men’s room and the door shut behind him. Much like the dining room, the bathroom looked like it was worth more than the Parker’s apartment. The only thing out of place among the marble floors and porcelain sinks was a little yellow ‘CAUTION: wet floors’ sign.

Peter rolled up his sleeves and splashed his face with a little water. He was fine, he was _fine_ . Totally, one-hundred percent _peachey._

Sure, he couldn’t get through a sentence without either making finger guns, stuttering, or saying ‘um’ or ‘uh’ at least once, but he was completely fine.

Yeah, he was sweating from nerves and his hands were clammy as shit, but he was okie dokie.

Peter walked to the door, planning to go back to their table, but ended up just walking up the door and onto the ceiling, grabbing at his hair as he paced up their. It was weird, he knew, but it helped him, and that’s what mattered.

“Stop being ridiculous,” He told himself. “You’re overreacting! I’m overreacting.. Mister Stark said I was doing fine, so what the hell am I worried about? Oh, yeah, the whole this might be a really cruel joke thing. That’s what I’m worried about.”

It sounded silly, but Peter’s biggest worry was that. He just… he really liked this guy. Harry. All his life, he dealt with people faking being his friend for answers in school or just trying to use him for something, and he didn’t want it to be that way with Harry. This wasn’t some douchey classmate he was talking to because he was lonely in that class and it turned out it was only so he could get homework answers. Like previously stated, Peter really did like Harry. It always felt awful to be used, but Peter almost felt like he had a chance now, that Harry could possibly like him back, and that would make it hurt so much worse. If it even turned out that way.

Was he overthinking?

He might be overthinking.

He was probably overthinking.

“Hey Peter, how’s the ransom going?”

Oh shit, he was screwed now.

With split second thinking, said thinking only being _‘Harry can’t see me up here’_ , Peter fell off the ceiling. Well, it’s described as a fall, but he more or less just jumped off from being startled. The clumsy spider-boy hit his chin on one of the sinks on his way down and landed painfully on his ankle.

“Oh shi--!” Peter had cried out, still lying on the tile with a pounding headache . “Owww….”

“Holy hell, man!” Harry ran over and knelt down besides his friend. “Are you okay? What happened?”

“I, uh,” Think, think, think! “Slipped. Wet floors, but a sign… ow… can’t stop me from not being cautious.”

Despite his concern, the Osborn hier couldn’t help but laugh a little at that. “Dude, you’re such a dork sometimes.”

Maybe it was because he’d just been hanging upside-down for at least two minutes and all the blood had rushed to his head, but Pete’s face was tinted red. He tried sitting up, a worried Harry helping him and placing a hand on his back the whole time as he did. “Ow… ow, ow, ow!” Peter placed a hand on the back of his head where there was now a little bump from the impact. Fan-fucking-tastic.

“Damn, that looks painful,” Harry stood up, grabbed a paper towel and wet it in the sink. “What’d you hit?”

“Well, my head,” Peter began, listing the obviously with playful sarcasm. “I landed weird on my ankle, and I-I, um, I think I hit my chin too.”

“I can see that,” He knelt down besides Peter once again. “It’s bleeding a bit. Let me get that for you.”

While the cut stung, causing the teen to wince and hiss a few times, he had definitely turned as red as the blood Harry was wiping away with the close proximity and the intense gaze. The knot feeling in his stomach returned, but the small bit of nausea might’ve been from the head injury this time around.

“You think Flash would, um, believe some kinda cool war, uh, war story for that cut so he’d back off?” Peter asked after Harry had finished.

“As cool as that’d be, I don’t know,” The other answered. “Stories aside, I can still make sure he backs off.Trust me.”

“I do, b-but you don’t have to do that. I-I can take it. Really.”

“Maybe I can’t take watching my friend getting treated like shit.”

“It’s okay. I promise.”

Harry decided not to push it, though still very frustrated-- more so frustrated with their dick-bag peer than Peter’s stubbornness, but the latter was still pretty annoying sometimes. Annoying, but endearing. “Alright, let’s look at your ankle, you said it hurt, right?” He asked, changing subjects.

“Um, yeah,” Peter moved to touch it before a bright and sharp pain exploded from that area. “Ow-- I mean, i-it’s fine. Just a, uh, bit sore.”  


“Bit sore?” Harry gently moved the other’s pant leg up and moved the sock down. There, Peter’s ankle was an angry red and already starting to swell. It made Harry cringe. “Ouch, dude. It looks ike you sprained it or something.”

“I-I’m sure it’s fine.”

“If it’s fine, stand up.”

So, Peter tried to stand himself up, but not only did he experience some vertigo because of how he hit his head, but as soon as he tried to put the smallest it of pressure on his ankle it hurt like hell. The teen almost fell back down, but Harry caught and steadied him. “ _The_ Peter Parker was wrong,” he teased. “Guess who’s gonna start running for the highest GPA in school now.”

“I don’t have the highest..”

“Who else does then?”

“I don’t know about you, but I don’t really keep track of that.”

“You will when you’re older.”

“You’re only a few months older than me, Harry!”

As they battered, the elder teen wrapped his arm around Peter’s waist-- which absolutely did not bring a raising heart and feeling of vertigo again-- as he helped him stand on the one good foot. He had Pete put his arm around his shoulder for support and then exited the bathroom. “C’mon, gotta take you to Mister Stark so you can get put in bubble wrap,” Harry had told him.The dining room, once again, was awful to navigate, especially with how Peter would cringe each time someone nudged his foot that he kept up in the air.

“What the hell happened?” Tony asked, rising from his seat after seeing his kid limping towards him. “I thought you were just going to the damn bathroom, did you get into a bar fight?”

“I, uh, sorta slipped,” Peter explained. “Wet tiles and all.”

“He hit his head and I think his ankle is sprained.” Harry added, just to be certain he didn’t try and act like he was fine.

“Kid, I told your aunt it was a nice, quiet dinner. You think she’ll let me take you anywhere after I broke her nephew?”

“I’ll be fine, Mister Stark. Really. It’s not that bad.”

“He can’t walk.”

“ _Harry--_ ”

“Yeah, I can see that.” Tony sighed. “Alright, c’mon Pete. Let’s go get you fixed up.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s alright, but you’re telling May.”

“Sounds fair.”

Harry then transferred Peter over to Tony, who made sure the kid was in no way trying to get on his ankle, and thanked him for helping his disaster of an intern. “Well, we’ll be going then. Thanks for making sure he didn’t kill himself trying to get back here on his own.”

“It’s no problem. Nice to see you.”  


“You too, Harry.” Tony replied with a bit of a grin. It faded, however, when he turned to the other Osborn. “Norman.”

“See you Monday?” Peter asked.

“Mhm, see you Monday.” Harry smiled.

Tony then started leading Peter towards the elevator, careful to not have either of them run into anyone and questioning the kid on how the hell he managed to get himself hurt like that in such a short time, before Harry caught back up to them two. “Sorry, just one more thing,” he said, turning to Peter. “You have my number, right? Y’know, to coordinate the project stuff.”

“Y-yeah, yeah. There’s also Instagram DM’s, if we, uh, need.”

“Right, right.”

“We, um, could work on the project a-at my place next weekend, if you want?”

“Sure, sounds fun. Maybe grab a bite to eat?”  


“I-I mean, there’s this good sandwich place a few blocks from my, uh, apartment.”

“It’s a date, then.” And with that, Harry turned back to leave, Peter holding his breath just a little.

Tony was grinning all the way to the elevator, but finally said something when the doors shut behind them. “Kid, did you really just pick a _deli_ for a first date? Your first date in general? Have I taught you nothing?”

“First of all, i-it’s not my _first_ first date--”

“Your Homecoming doesn’t count.”

“But--”  


“You were with the girl for not even five minutes and her dad tried to… No. Not a date.”

“Okay fine,” Peter nearly pouted. “I-it’s still not a date with Harry though.”

  
  
“Pete, look at me,” He looked. “Harry literally said the phrase _‘it’s a date’_. You’re going to have a date that weekend.”

Peter’s eyes widened upon his delayed realization, and somehow turned pale in an instant despite how red his face had been. “Oh my god,” he breathed. “I have an actual date. With Harry.”

“Hey, don’t pass out on me, now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings, lads and lassies (and all y'all pals in between)!  
> Once again, so sorry for the delay. Hope it was worth it, though!!  
> Also, disaster bi Peter is almost entirely based on how I'd handle an actual crush mix with how I handled seeing this really pretty singer once and how I handle seeing these two really fucking attractive seniors in my school, especially in the JROTC uniforms (it's not fair, guys. They're too afdsjgabajb)  
> \- <3 Samuel  
> ( Tumblr & Instagram: ssssssssssssssassssspiderboi )

**Author's Note:**

> Greetings, lads and lassies (and all y'all pals in between)!  
> This was so fun to write and completely self indulgent. I also may or may not have gotten the idea off of either a Tumblr or Twitter post, so...  
> Should I add another chapter to this? I don't know, but I'll leave that up to y'all.  
> \- <3 Sam  
> (Tumblr: ssssssssssssssssssspiderboi )


End file.
